Cuteness

Hannah decided to do the "Little Piggies" to Libby's toes. This is how it went.

"This little piggy went to market"

"This little piggy went home"

"This little piggy cried 'WEE WEE WEE'"

"This little piggy went to Target"

"This little piggy went to eat"

(apparently Libby has six toes) "This little piggy went to store"

Truer words have not been spoken

Me: Hannah, come here! Libby has all of mama's attention so I want your attention!

Hannah: Noooooo I don't have attention.

Awww

Libby came today. Hannah was mostly pretty quiet about it, but one good exchange resulted.

A friend of Julie's came by to take a few pictures, and Hannah was there.

Photographer: Hannah, do you have a boyfriend?

Hannah: No, I have Libby.

YES!

Julie: I love Hannah.

Hannah: I love Daddyyyy!

More materialism

We're probably going to have to put Hannah through a Christmas etiquette course.

We went to the mall today to get the Santa visit/pictures out of the way with Libby about to come. Hannah told us she was going to tell Santa she wants two bags of candy and a sleeping bag.

We got to Santa and she was, as always, nervous. After finally taking the pictures and very sheepishly telling Santa what she wanted, we thought we were ready to leave.

We were wrong.

Hannah started weeping uncontrollably. Finally we figured out she thought Santa was going to give her the stuff she wanted while we were there.

After explaining to her repeatedly that Santa doesn't bring the stuff until Christmas Day, we got this pitiful response:

Hannah (sobbing): BUT I WANT MY SLEEPING BAG NOOOOOOOOOOW!

Materialism

Hannah: Where you going daddy?

Me: School

Hannah: Why you go to school daddy?

Me: To learn

Hannah: Why daddy?

Me: So I can get a good job and buy you stuff.

Hannah (jumping up and down): Weeeeeeeeeee stuff!

Literalism, Part Deux

Me: Why don't you pet Mama for a while, Hannah?

Hannah: No! (In a singing tone) Sheeeee's noooot a doooooooooooooog!

More gratuitous nudity

Me: You can't make muffins naked, Hannah.

Hannah: But whyyyyyyyyy?

I can kiss away your pain

"You're my hero, daddy!"

This does not make a father happy ...

Julie and Hannah were going to take a bath together a few nights ago.

Julie decided to get some last-minute things done in the kitchen and told Hannah to go get her clothes off.

A few minutes later, Hannah ran into the kitchen, sans clothes, to tell her mama:

"I'M SUPER NAKED MAMA!"

Pill poppers

Hannah, unlike most children, has always been good about taking her medicine. In fact, she really likes taking medicine.

Well last week she had one of her recurring sinus flareups. I was in the shower one morning when suddenly Hannah came storming in the door.

Hannah: I TOOK SOME MEDICINE DADDY!

Me: Sounds cool.

Hannah: IT'S MY LUCKY DAYYYYYYY!

:Facepalm

Me: Come here Hannah, I want hugs and kisses!

Hannah: No! I want juice.

That is so fetch

Hannah's love of fashion has already been noted, but she's taken it to another level lately. Now she's complimenting us on our clothes.

For instance:

(while wearing a Dodgers hoodie I got while in L.A. in May)

Hannah: I like your hoodie.

Me: You do?

Hannah: Mmhmm, where'd you get it?

(while wearing jeans I've had for as many as 10 years)

Hannah: I like your new pants.

Me: These aren't new I've had these since I was in high school I think!

Hannah: Ohhhhhhhhh ... (long pause) where'd you get it?

I'm not schizophrenic yes I am

Me: All right Hannah I'm getting in the shower.

Hannah: I don't want you to go.

Me: You don't?

Hannah: No, I want you.

Me: No you don't you never want me.

Hannah: I want youuuuuu.

Me: OK well give me a kiss.

Hannah: NO!

Product Placement

We were watching the Back to the Future movies on ABC Family last night. Julie and I were sitting at the table eating, and Hannah was watching on the couch. A Pillsbury crescent rolls commercial came on.

Narrator: Do you have enough crescents?

Hannah: No!

Pepe LePew

Hannah and I were playing on the floor pretending to be swimming in the ocean.

"Help, I'm sinking!" I said.

"I'm stinking too!" Hannah said.